Welcome to the Hearth

Welcome to the Hearth

Monday, August 11, 2008

Home at last!

Mom left us quietly in the wee hours of the morning on August 10th. She was probably waiting until we were all tucked in our respective beds fast asleep, so she could at last have her own final rest. Moms are like that. I couldn't resist putting this picture of her up in tribute, as it has always been my favorite, and I'm sure, a form she would like to take if she ever comes visiting us from dream time. This is how I will remember her. I find myself gathering little embers of memories... things I treasure about my mother. I don't think I ever turned out to be the "girly-girl" mom really wanted. She used to love to comb my long hair when I was about 5 or 6 years old until one day I discovered a pair of scissors and decided to see how they worked on my own hair. I must have really took a chunk out right close to the scalp because then for quite a while, I had this little boy bob and my father would jokingly call me sonny, just to see my mother break out in tears. One Christmas time I remember she fixed a plate of Christmas cookies and she and I would lounge on her bed while she read me "Little Women."

Whenever she saw me, she would always ask: "How's that beautiful daughter of mine?" I don't ever remember going through that stage when I was a teenager of looking in the mirror thinking there was something missing. I'd always say approvingly to myself: "Well, you look OK..." There were many other ways that I was gifted by my mother, but I think it was the confidence she instilled in me that I really treasure. No matter what strange idea I might come up with and try out on her, she always said: "Sure, why not!" I know my other siblings will have their stories and memories and even though we had the same childhood, each experienced it from their perspective. I'm glad I have mine.

Towards the end of her life, she had a very rich fantasy life which seemed to include lots of great grandchildren. According to her, my nephew and his wife had about 69 children. Many of them were twins or triplets. She was sure they had to hire a bus to get everyone to church. Her favorite great-grand child, the one she spent the most time with, apparently, was little Mary Rose. Evidently the little one would help her out at dinner time and eat the food mom didn't like because she didn't want "Gam ma" to get in trouble for not eating her vegetables. I personally liked this world she lived in and used to talk often to her about different aspects of it. I thought: Why not? That's why we watch TV and go to the movies, isn't it, to enter into another world?

I'm looking forward to continuing the relationship, now that she is free to come and go, unencumbered by physicality.I have no doubt it will still include a few:" sure why nots" from the other side. So, another soul joins my cheering section. I wonder what we will all be creating together? I'm sure hearts will be involved.


Rebecca said...

Your Mother is beautiful! I have no doubt she will drop in from time to time to check on you, dispense advice and visit. You are blessed with memories and the ability to see her world(s) from her vantage point.

Yes, your cheering section is growing - on both sides of the bridge.

Much love and heartfelt blessings,

Patty said...

I am sorry to hear of the loss of your mother, but feel that she is at peace and hope that you are too.
Blessings to you and big hugs

miss*R said...

she certainly was a gorgeous woman.
I did the scissor trick too, when I was a little girl and have a photo of what had to be done to 'fix' it.. I love Little Women.. one of my favourite books.. I always wanted to be Jo.. and always, always wanted to be like Mrs March, delivering baskets to the needy.
and you know.. those grandchildren... maybe she did have them.. maybe she could see them but you couldn't... there is more to it all than meets the eye as you know...maybe they were her children's souls from past lives..

cannot wait to hear what this cheering member gets up to on the other side xoxo
keeping you very close to my heart centre xoxo

thailandchani said...

She is beautiful.. and I have no doubt that she will be looking in on you. Your description of her is exquisite!


AwtemNymf said...

What a beautiful tribute! Beautiful Mother too!

kim said...

Beautiful photo and beautiful tribute!

Anonymous said...

What a beautiful picture you've let me see by opening this window into your heart and past. I just love the part about her fantasy world with all the great grandchildren. That has put a huge smile on my face today. Good for you for going there with her.

This seems to be a time for departures, have you noticed a cluster?

Carla said...

What a beautiful woman! I wonder if all her great-grandchildren were angels, keeping her company until she joined them even more fully. Bless you, Sister K -- your sister too -- as you move through your emotions and into a new relationship with your Mom.

Wendy said...

What a wonderful mother you have.
I can clearly see her great grandchildren all around her. They were probably souls from a past life. Or a future one.

We share some of the same memories. Cutting off a chunk of my hair (I got paint on it), reading Little Women in bed (I think I had the flu and mom was comforting me).

I dreamed of my mother for a few years after she died (May 1998), but haven't in quite a while. I think she has moved on. Her work is done here.
My dad died 8 weeks to the day after mom died. I still dream of him quite vividly, although in life we could not communicate.

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